I don't know how much longer I can stand these mood swings of mine. I don't suppose they're really mood swings, it's just that... nothing is consistent in my life. My relationships are inconsistent (and for the most part, sustained only by myself)--family, especially. Schedule is inconsistent. Nothing (and no one) in my life seems as though it's here to stay, and I feel completely alone. Even thinking something like that, I feel selfish; a few of my closest friends, it seems, have been depressed lately. I wish I could help them, but it would appear that I can't even help myself.
It's snowing today, first real snow of the season; I played in it, and felt younger. I hate this. I'm only eighteen... I'm too young to feel so old. I feel almost completely worn down. There are a few feeble threads holding me together, and they're bound to give in any day now.