I wish someone would drive far away from the city with me to watch the meteor shower tonight. I wish. :(

Strapped for cash in the mid-1950s, Kurt Vonnegut took a job at Sports Illustrated, though he “didn’t care or know squat about sports.”

They asked him to write a piece about a racehorse that had jumped the fence at the local track.

He fed a page into his typewriter, stared at it for several hours, typed “The horse jumped over the fucking fence” and left.

StumbleUpon is making this day suck a bit less. 

I'm always doing the wrong thing, and doubting myself more with every passing day.

I dreamed that I was sleeping outside, and in my dream... I woke up to the rain, falling at first in sporadic droplets. They grew steadier, until it poured... and for some reason, this is one of the best dreams I've ever had.

I woke up at 4:09 this morning. I was dreaming about her; I wish I could have stayed in that dream. To an extent, I think that everyone enjoys their dreams more than reality, but... everything was okay in this dream. More so than any dream I've ever had, probably. I wish I could remember it.

"Champagne Supernova" came on the radio a few hours later, while I was driving to school. She introduced me to that song, as she did with many of my now-favorites, so long ago. The other night, I heard some song by Metallica for the first time in a while; not particularly my favorite... but I can still see her air drumming to it, singing more enthusiastically than anyone I've ever known or ever will know, I'm quite sure. I miss her voice so much. Her infectious laugh... the way her nose crinkled when she did so.

Sometimes, I feel like I've made it all up-- that Melanie and each of her wonderful quirks are but figments of my imagination. I miss her so much, I wish I knew a word stronger than "miss." I wish I had more people to talk to that knew her. I wish I didn't have to wish things like this.

Oh, how I have missed the rain...

I'm an awful friend, and I hate the person I've become. I'm trying to change it, but I feel that the more I try, the more I dislike myself. I can't keep myself from running in circles.

Wow. It doesn't take much at all to make me feel entirely rejected. Have I become one of those people? One of those girls that is always begging for attention of some sort? I don't think that I beg for it but I've certainly been a thousand times needier within these past few months. If I have annoyed you in any way, I'm sorry.

Holy shit. Best day I've had, in quite a long time. I guess I'm just simple-minded and good weather enforces my happiness. But, for the first time in a while, I'm feeling a sense of purpose... and I feel loved, by some of the most amazing people I've ever met. I hope these feelings are here to stay.

Most importantly, my favorite British person in the woooorld has asked me to tea! DAMN, that's awesome. ^_^